This blog was written for Valeo by Daphne DeMaris. In 25 years as a Christ Focused Counselor, and in pursuing her own healing, Daphne DeMaris, MA, LPCC (and soon to be CIMHP – Certified Integrative Medicine Health Provider for Mental Health) learned to address healing in the body as well as in the mind, emotions and Spirit. Daphne has a telehealth practice serving adult individuals and couples in Florida, Maine, Michigan and Minnesota. She has also been a speaker for close to 30 years to audiences at churches, women’s events, and providing healing retreats and more.
Are you someone who loves spring cleaning? You love decluttering, getting in the corners and getting the cobwebs out, seeing everything sparkle and creating that clean visual space because it just makes you feel better?
Well, what about doing the same thing for your heart, mind, and spirit? All of these pieces of us can be clogged up with our emotional wounds and distorted thoughts piled one on top of the other. The longer we let these aspects of our personhood go untended, the more bogged down we get.
Because you come to Valeo, you are already dealing with the physical pieces of the puzzle that contribute to overall health. Physical health impacts our mental and emotional health. Likewise, a lack of spiritual health and emotional health can negatively impact our physical health. I always tell my clients, we are body, mind, and spirit and either it all works together, or it all falls apart. So what are some ways you can address the mind, emotions and heart that can support your overall healing and continued wellbeing? I’ll get to that and give you some tools to help.
But, first, do you have bugs that get in your house? I have boxelder beetles and I keep finding a little carcass here or there that I need to sweep up. These beetles are like the automatic negative thoughts (ANTS) that most of us have. These thoughts creep in and contribute to anger, depression, or anxiety. How and what we think impacts how we feel and how we act. If we feed on a steady stream of thoughts that are not true, is it any wonder if we struggle sometimes with ‘negative’ emotions that weigh us down?
Part of my spring cleaning will be to check under beds and in corners or window frames to see if I have missed any little dead bugs. Part of dealing with so called negative/distorted thoughts is to take inventory of my thoughts. The easiest way to do this is to start with my emotions. If I am feeling anxious or irritable, I ask, ‘what was I just thinking about’? I can write down my specific thoughts and ask myself what the factual evidence is that proves that thought. If the evidence doesn’t support that thought, what does it show?
The Bible tells us to take every thought captive to bring it into submission to Christ. Does the thought line up with objective truth? Does is line up with Biblical truth? If not, I need to start telling myself the truth and agreeing with the truth presented by God. It is not just the truth of who Jesus is that sets us free. All truth has the power to set us free from any corresponding lie and that will set us free from damaging emotions.
Another part of spring cleaning may be going through the closets. We leave a lot of stuff in the closets that no one sees, except maybe us and God. And, while our thoughts are very important, more important is our relationship with God, through Jesus. We cannot live incongruently with our design and with our Maker and expect that to lead to great health. We cannot ignore things that God calls important and expect to have ease of spirit and healthy emotions. We need to clean out our spiritual closets.
Easter is upon us and the time for contemplating what Jesus did for us by taking that beating, within an inch of his very life, and then going to the cross to make all healing and salvation possible. This time of year is always good for a spiritual inventory. I have many tools that I offer clients to help them make an examination of their hearts, but I will just give you three areas to contemplate and pray about.
The first and second commandments talk about not having any other gods and not making an idol of anything, so start there.
1. Lord, have I tried to wedge anything (any person, any idea, any ‘thing’) up there on the throne next to you? Show me if I have put anything before or above you. Do I have any false idols that need to be cast down?
Next, ask Holy Spirit to show you your heart. Jeremiah 17:9 tells us that our hearts are deceitful but God examines the heart and can show us our sins so we can confess. We cannot expect to have ease of spirit if we are deliberately and willfully engaging in sin. Thankfully, He is faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us from unrighteousness. And that will bring ease of spirit and emotion and freedom in our lives.
2. Lord, search me and show me any sinful way in myself. Help me be honest with myself and honest with you. Thank you for all you did to make a way for me to be made clean.
And finally, one more bugger. The tenth commandment tells us not to covet. When we set our minds on something believing that we cannot be happy without it, we are telling God that he is making a mistake. We will stay in a place of pain far longer than necessary when we do this. But your father longs to be gracious to you and will set you free when you go to him with this.
3. Lord, have I set my heart on anything believing that unless I have it that I cannot be happy? Show me if I believe that I need that spouse or that title or that house in that neighborhood and if I have been demanding that you give me what I think I need. Lord, help me to let go of what I think, so that you can give me what you know is best and will give me peace and contentment.
When we deal with our thoughts and our sins before the Lord, we can be cleansed of the clutter that weighs us down and holds us back from peace and joy and contentment. Take some time for a spring cleaning of the mind and the soul so your body, mind and spirit can bloom and grow and flourish!
